Ugly Betty Writers “Finish” Gossip Girl’s Season

This looks like it was a lot of fun. While writers of television shows are mostly idle, New York Magazine  had the writers of many popular shows “finish” the seasons of other popular shows.  Having recently completed a similar exercise with Lost (and don’t worry, more are on the way), I know how fun these can be.

Two Ugly Betty writers, Veronica Becker and Sarah Kuscerka, were given the assignment of completing Gossip Girl’s season.  The results, of course, are predictably hilarious.  Here are a few excerpts:

EPISODE 14: “The Breakup”
Sure, Serena and Dan were a match made in heaven—too bad Manhattan society’s social scene is hell. After one too many masquerade balls, debutante debuts, and Botox brunches, the differences between this Uptown Girl and her Wrong Side of the Tracks Romeo become too much for the couple to bear. After a disastrous V-Day, a spurned D. leaves his love for good. 

And for the SEASON FINALE … “Prom Night“

When it comes time to pick a prom date, Dan shuns his upper-crust admirers, preferring something more hipster than couture. Who? Friend/stalker Vanessa, who enrolls in his school just in the nick of time. With the old guard fallen from grace, there’s room for a new clique in the halls, and Brooklynites Dan, Vanessa, and Jenny are it. But Dan and Vanessa’s budding romance hits a Sapphic snag at the club Tenjune when Prom King and Queen are announced.

Check out some of the dialog, after the jump.

JENNY: (to the CROWD) And your 2008 Prom King and Queen are…shocker! Dan and Vanessa!

CHUCK presses “send” on his phone.

CHUCK: (to the CROWD) Not for long. Gossip Girl just posted, and it looks like one of you is still in love with…Serena?!

DAN: (pleads with VANESSA) It’s not true, I swear. Look at her-she’s nothing but a crack whore now!

NATE AND SERENA: (to no one in particular) Sniff, sniff.

BLAIR: (CROSS in one hand, she winds up to punch DAN) That crack whore is my best friend!

VANESSA: (to SERENA) It’s not Dan who loves you … It’s me. You’re so hot!

SERENA: (flattered, and totally wasted) Huh. Well, this party sucks anyway. Wanna make out?

Hmm, I’ve heard this joke before.  It was funny the first time Amanda said it (to Christina, I think).  I guess it’s still funny now, I’ve just heard it before.

Anyway, go read the whole thing, it’s very, very funny.  If you are a fan of Gossip Girl, you’ll get a kick out of it.  There are also spoofs of The Office, Friday Night Lights, and Grey’s Anatomy.  Too bad nobody “finished” Ugly Betty’s season.